Expression

Transcription

Roots 

that I will never have the courage to say what I want / that I will always be unable to express myself verbally correctly / that I will always care too much / that I will fail and she will never understand why / that I am only partially applying myself and what if I were to give more? / that I think I’m being smart but I’m actually being stupid. Again and again and again. / that I will be forgotten, that all I write will be recycled or burned or pulverized into pulp / that half my ideas aren’t original at all. And that I’m only a derivative of all those before me / that I will lose myself and my way and that I will end up alone and miserable / that he will never know how I really feel. That he will never understand / that my typhoon will calm and I will be average and boring and old / that I will burn my bridges without realizing it. And then it’s too late / that all was pointless, that I never helped anyone / that I was a burden. That I was an obstacle.

Bark

I am a mother. I am a wife. I am a friend. I am a daughter. I am a sister. I am an auntie. I am a historian. I am a writer. I am a sketcher. I am a lover. I am a soother. I am a traveler. I am a well-wisher. I am a cook. I am a teacher and a student. I am educated but stupid. I am always churning. I am always antsy. I am best on my own. I am smothered in cities without trees & air. I am lost in my head. I am quiet. I am rude. I am impulsive. I am obstinate. I am melancholy. I am tattooed. I am curious. I am doubtful. I am pessimistic. I will always doubt my actions afterward / I will always have regrets / I will always be awkward.